Dementia changes the way conversations unfold, but it doesn’t mean meaningful connection is lost. It simply requires a shift in approach, a little patience, and an open heart. Think of it as learning a new rhythm—following their lead, embracing the moment, and creating warmth through words and gestures.
The Power of Tone, Body Language, and Familiar Phrases
When words become harder to find, how you communicate matters even more than what you say. A reassuring tone, a gentle touch, and a familiar phrase can speak volumes.
Tone Matters – Your Voice is Their Anchor
Your voice can be a source of calm and comfort—keep it steady and soothing.
If they mix up names or details, gently go along with it rather than correcting them.
Short, simple sentences help keep communication clear and easy to follow.
The Role of Body Language – Connection Beyond Words
Eye contact reassures them that you are present and engaged.
A gentle touch on the hand or a warm embrace can provide comfort and reassurance.
Mirroring their expressions can help build emotional connection, even when words fail.
Familiar Phrases – The Magic of Nostalgia
Music, prayers, or well-loved sayings often remain intact in memory—use them to spark a connection.
Try starting and letting them finish a familiar phrase (e.g., “It’s a beautiful day…”).
Repetition is soothing—if they tell the same story multiple times, respond as if it’s the first time you hear it.
Ways to Respond When Words Don’t Make Sense
As dementia progresses, conversations may not always follow a logical pattern, but that doesn’t mean they lack meaning. The key is to focus on the emotion behind the words, rather than the accuracy of the statements.
Keep Conversations Flowing – It’s Not About Facts, It’s About Feeling
Validate their emotions. Instead of “That’s not right,” say “I understand why that’s important to you.”
Ask open-ended questions. If they struggle with details, try “Tell me more about that.”
Step into their reality. If they mix up past and present, avoid correcting them—simply follow their lead.
Use sensory triggers. A favourite song, a familiar scent, or a treasured photo can help bridge gaps in memory and create meaningful moments.
What NOT to Do
❌ “Remember?” – If they don’t, it can be distressing.
❌ Argue or correct. What matters is comfort, not accuracy.
❌ Rush them. Give them time—meaningful conversations don’t need to happen quickly.
The "Yes, And..." Technique – Following Their Lead
A simple but powerful way to keep conversations stress-free is using the "Yes, and..." technique. Instead of correcting, acknowledge their reality and build on it to keep them engaged and reassured.
How to Use “Yes, And...”
They say: “I need to go to work now.”
❌ Wrong: “You don’t have a job anymore.”
✅ Right: “Work was such a big part of your life. What did you love most about it?”
They say: “Mum is coming to pick me up soon.”
❌ Wrong: “Mum passed away years ago.”
✅ Right: “Your mum was such a wonderful woman. What’s your favourite memory with her?”
See the difference? Instead of creating distress, you create connection.
Final Thoughts – Keeping the Connection Alive
Dementia may change the way we communicate, but it will never take away the power of human connection. Patience, kindness, and presence mean more than perfect words ever could.
By focusing on tone, body language, validation, and creative engagement, you can ensure that conversations remain meaningful, even as words fade.
At the end of the day, it’s not about getting the words right—it’s about making your loved one feel safe, valued, and loved. And that’s something words alone could never fully capture. 💙
Disclaimer: The content provided in this blog was sourced via various independent industry blogs and other relevant sources and is for informational and educational purposes only. A.C.A staff have over 35 years experience within the agedcare industry but we are not medical clinicians, and as such, all above information should not be considered as professional medical advice. Always consult with a qualified GP or qualified healthcare professional for medical advice and treatment of any kind.
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